I am constantly comparing myself to others and I have found that with access to social media and the internet being so available that this has increased.
As a mum and especially as a first time mum the internet and social media can be a powerful tool to support and empower you with knowledge to be the best and do the best for your little one. It can also make you second guess everything you do, make you worry that your not doing the right thing for your little one and generally feel that others totally have it all ‘sussed’ while you feel your failing miserably.
When I found out I was pregnant I followed some parenting blogs, Mummy/Daddy Instagram accounts and Facebook support groups. I found this so useful and were such a support during my pregnancy and would definitely recommend to any mum-to-be. It’s great to see how others are parenting, any hints and tips they have and generally steal nursery ideas from!! However I found that as soon as I had Amelia I was comparing everything that I was doing to others that seemed to have everything so perfect.
‘how does she look that good after giving birth?’
‘why does my baby always seem to cry? Other babies look to be so calm and content.. I must be doing something wrong’
‘oh I don’t have one of those for Amelia I better get one’
These are just some of the questions and statements I used to think after looking at some of the parenting posts online. I felt lesser as a parent in comparison to those that posted these statuses or images because I didn’t have the same things, or Amelia wasn’t as settled and finally because I hadn’t washed my hair and put a face full of make up on.
Now if I posted the below photo on my social media you would assume that we had a lovely Costa coffee date and day out in Kingston.
But how wrong you can be….
This photo doesn’t show you the two outfit changes for Amelia and one outfit change for me we had before we even left the house. It doesn’t show you the screaming that we had in the car all the way to Kingston. It doesn’t show you projectile vomit over herself, me and the majority of the table at Costa or me looking embarrassed at the noise/scene we had created.
Some of my favourite blogs and posts online are the ones that show the realistic face of motherhood and parenting. The messy house, vomit stained clothes, the crying child and the confidence to say when times have been tough.. bared for all to see.
Thank you to those that do not hide behind the perfect image of parenting. Thank you for helping me to not feel alone, that not everyone has it sussed and that everyone is winging it! #wingingitatmotherhood